I will call the winners to the stage, right here on the parquet floor.
This has been an exceptional show - seven games, coast to coast, back and forth - and I want to thank everyone who has been involved, even if you've only been watching the games on the living room floor, holding your breath during the second end of one-and-one foul shots. A special thanks to the Boston Celtics and the Los Angeles Lakers.
Here are the awards. Please hold your applause until the end . . .
Most Memorable Shot (1) - Before the sixth game in Los Angeles, the Celtics' Gerald Henderson was practicing at one basket by himself. A group of fans began hooting at him as they stood on the sidelines.
Henderson walked to them and started talking. He gave them the ball and they began taking long shots at the basket from behind the row of courtside seats. Henderson retrieved the ball.
Finally, one of the fans handed a kid who appeared to be about 9 years old to Henderson. The Celtics guard carried the kid to within 10 feet of the basket and set him on the floor. The kid took one shot. Swish. Everyone in the Fabulous Forum applauded.
Best Talker - Cedric Maxwell. No contest. He was a downright quote machine, making a thoughtful analogy about every facet of the series. He even talked with body language, giving the choke sign when James Worthy missed that foul shot in the closing stages of the fourth game.
"Before Kevin McHale hit Kurt Rambis, the Lakers were just running across the street whenever they wanted," Max said in one favorite quote. "Now, they stop at the
corner, push the button, wait for the light and look both ways."
Second place went to M.L. Carr. Third was a surprising tie between Larry Bird and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar.
Best Fan - Step right up here, Jack Nicholson. Put this right next to the Oscar.
You were terrific, from beginning to end. The fact that you weren't giving interviews about this, saying, "It's not my show, it's theirs," only made you better.
Biggest Frontrunners - First prize goes to a few members of a Saugus Travel trip to Los Angeles who watched the third-game rout of the Celtics and flew home the next day, canceling their reservations for the fourth game. How to go, folks.
Second prize goes to the rest of us. We said the Celtics didn't have a chance after the third game. (The Lakers are too good.) Then we said the Lakers didn't have a chance after the fifth game. (The Lakers don't have enough heart.)
Most Memorable Shot (2) - James Worthy's flying dunk against Larry Bird in the fourth game. He went around Bird and under the basket and came back with a rama-slamma from behind the backboard that would have made The Good Doctor himself quite proud.
James Worthy also had the next half-dozen or so most memorable shots during games.
Most Inspirational Sight - The players on the Celtics' bench fanning the starters during timeouts during the hothouse fifth game. M.L. Carr had that cheapo-cheapo fan. Quinn Buckner had a towel. The entire bench was involved in the effort to beat both the Lakers and the heat.
There was a lovely, old-time, small-time look to the proceedings.
Best Fan Club - The Rambis Youth. This group contained a half-dozen kids who wore Lakers' purple T-shirts - I Am An Official Member Of Rambis Youth - and dark-rimmed eyeglass frames to resemble their hero.
They waited before one game for Maxwell with a sign that read: "Maxwell is Dirt, Compared to Kurt." Maxwell borrowed a pair of the glasses and did a Rambis impression. He took one shot and missed the basket by 30 feet.
Best Paraphernalia - A bunch of Celtics fans arrived for the fifth game with pieces of clothesline, complete with wooden clothespins. The fans were cheering Kevin McHale's hit - a clothesline - on Rambis in the fourth game that was portrayed as the meanest act since Little Orphan Annie was left in the cold.
"It's OK, Kevin," one of the clothesliners told McHale. "That play looked like a charge by Rambis to us."
Best Player - Kareem this. Kareem that. Magic this. Magic that.
Take it away, Larry Bird. Even on your worst nights you were spectacular to watch.
Most Poignant Link To The Past - Jerry West, the current general manager and former Lakers star on all those teams that finished second to the Celtics, told an NBA official he wouldn't be going to Boston for the seventh game.
"Why not?" the NBA official asked.
"Too nervous," Jerry West said. "I'd get too nervous. I couldn't stand it."
Best Sportswriter Fun - During the long stretch between the first game and the second, with Boston attacked by rain, a group of sportswriters was in the hospitality room at the Marriott Hotel with nothing to do. The sportswriters went to an old standby, filling a wastebasket with water and setting it atop the partially opened front door.
Lakers coach Pat Riley then walked through the door.
Strangest Trip - The Celtics could have clinched the series on Sunday in Los Angeles. They took a long, red-eye flight afterward that started at 10 p.m. (LA time), stopped for an hour in New York at JFK airport, then arrived in Boston at 7:30 on Monday morning.
If the Celtics had won the title, the flight would have been seven hours of hijinks and hilarity, completed with a giant welcoming crowd at Logan Airport. The flight was seven hours of sleep and casual conversation. The crowd at the airport was comprised of friends and relations.
Most Memorable Shot (3) - Tommy Heinsohn, the former Celtics forward and present CBS announcer, was walking across the court before the fifth game. A ball rolled to his feet. He picked it up, threw up a 20-footer, sportcoat and all, and it zipped through the basket.
He tried to continue walking as if he still could do this every day, but as people cheered, a nice smile came across Tommy Heinsohn's face.
Best In Show - Well, you probably know that one by now. Don't you?
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