We Kid because We Care (aka Give It to me Big Shelden)

OK, Darko.

We're almost done funnin' on ya.

But let's get something straight.


Your career has been a disappointment at best and the butt of jokes at worst.

The problem is that here in Boston, we don't laugh at our teams. We take this shit seriously. Every season starts with the same expectation, namely hoisting a banner at the end.

We don't waste time. We don't worry about playing time. What we do is bust our tails 24 by 7 by 365. And then we bust our tails one more time during leap year. You don't do that and you will quickly be relegated to the scrap heap of Celtic history, where your status as a laughing stock will be secure.

Example:

Shelden Williams.

All I really remember about him is how I greeted him with the above video. He did little a long the way to have me take him any more seriously than that. And there you have it. An entire Celtics' career summarized in a single 50-second clip that has nothing to do with basketball.

Surely, Darko, you have more to offer than that.

We know you have talent. We've seen the videos. While we're thinking about your talent, let me give you some advice. Ever heard of a cat named James Posey? He won a ring with the Miami Heat, but no one saw him as difference maker, nobody was willing to make a multi-year commitment until he took less money than he was worth to showcase his talent with the Celtics.

The result?

The C's won banner 17, Posey earned a place in Celtics' history as 6th Man Extraordinaire, and then Nails won himself the fat payoff he had been waiting for.

Surely, Darko, I don't have to spell this one out for you. 82 regular season games. Twenty to 25 playoff games. You consistently bring your best stuff, and someone, who knows, maybe Boston, will throw the greenbacks your way. But you don't get the greenbacks unless you make the commitment, and that commitment has to start now.

Got it?